Hey there, freethinker!
Change. Change. Change. It is so present in my life right now as I make big city and career transitions and so I thought it may support both my own process and possibly any big shifts happening for you to share my 5 tips to keep calm during a transition on the Live Your Freedom Now podcast.
It is so easy to manifest the Dominant Dogma: “Change is hard” internally, especially when you have experienced external realities where change was outside your control. Trust me, change has taken me by surprise again and again. But something my clients and I agree on is that leaning into the change that arrives is the best decision you can make.
…also, I talk about “adult” versions of safety blankets, and you don’t want to miss out on that!!
So let’s begin. In this episode, I share on:
- A practice to attune to your space and come home to your power
- The Dominant Dogma that “change is hard”
- Why this dogma can be rooted in reality when some external change was difficult for you
- How childhood safety mechanisms, unmet expectations and neurodivergence contribute to this narrative
- Coming to see that change, with time and self-tending, can result in a better, more fulfilling life
- What some of my clients have to say about why leaning into change is the best decision they ever made
- My 5 tips to keep calm during transition
- An invitation to receive my free Ecotherapy Meditation and Journal Prompts to do alongside my 5 tips
Listen to the episode wherever you like to listen to your podcasts.
Hello, hello, creative humans, today I am writing to you from my living room/dining room/kitchen floor (my place in D.C. is tiny, so it’s basically all the same thing). As I take this morning slowly, I’m sitting on my biomat to soak in all the negative ion energy and infrared heat. I have a delicious mango ginger iced tea to my left and my giant water bottle to my right. My notes are sitting on the biomat next to me, Patrick, my pup, is snuggled up in his bed, fast asleep in the closet, and things are very quiet today. Internally I’m feeling grateful, serene, and fully embracing this slow and easeful day.
As I take a moment to pause and notice my inner and outer worlds, I encourage you to do the same. Notice the colors within your world, the objects around you, where the light hits, and where shadows fall. Notice the textures of what is holding you and what is around you. Notice how your body feels today, how your heart feels, and if there are any tender or tight spaces in your being. Not judging what you see and are experiencing, simply noticing it. Allowing it. Honor it with your brief attention and presence. This is a practice of freedom that you can utilize at any time. A practice to attune to your space and come home to your power.
As a reminder: I encourage you to notice your inner and outer worlds in each episode because I believe freedom is found in the small present moments already surrounding us. That is where freedom of choice lives and where life is actually happening, so why not start our time here?
Additionally, within somatic healing and presence practices, a large part of cultivating inner capacity begins by noticing your environment. Not closing your eyes and disconnecting from your body and surroundings. Instead, breathe into the textures, the light, the shadows, the colors, and the weight of where you are. Right here and now.
Today, we are discussing the Dominant Dogma “change is hard.” Like last week’s Dominant Dogma, this narrative often manifests internally due to external realities where change can correlate to difficult times, where change was outside your control.
However, change does not always have to be difficult.
In today’s episode, I will share three reasons why this Dominant Dogma exists, the freedom on the other side, five steps to keep calm during transition, and an invitation to use my free Ecotherapy meditation for support when change hits in your world.
First, let’s take a look at three reasons why change can feel so hard:
1 – Childhood Safety Mechanisms
My clients usually come to me seeking change. They crave meaning in their life, to feel safe being themselves, and to live with deeper purpose and freedom. They WANT change. However, change is scary. They fear “messing up” what they already have and losing what has previously kept them feeling a level of safety (even if that safety is perceived certainty on what to expect daily).
Despite feeling stuck and craving change, some inner part seeks to keep them safe by keeping them caged.
Usually, this is rooted in a childhood version of them that picked up a belief that safety = sameness. That stability = not rocking the boat.
These narratives of what safety means are Dominant Dogma’s of their own and need re-evaluating, reframing, and reprogramming. The little selves within need the present, adult version of you to teach them a new definition of safety and stability that allow room for change. They need you to show them that change can invite DEEPER safety, freedom, growth, and stability. Change is where possibility lives.
2 – Unmet Expectations
Life is a co-creation. As such, nothing is guaranteed, and this is a terrifying fact. For folks who have felt let down by life, let down by humans within their life, the unmet expectations of a good life can make navigating change nearly impossible. In my own life, one time I experienced this was following the dissolution of my marketing agency and, with it, a friendship that I thought was strong, deep, and secure. I felt jaded by life. I felt jaded by humans who preached one thing and lived another. It hardened me. My dreams and expectations around that situation and relationship were dashed, and I became fearful of change and what others could do to me without second thoughts.
Life does this sometimes.
It’s part of the co-creation.
Change can take us by surprise. That is nearly certain.
And, we get to choose how we will respond.
From my example, before responding to the change thrown my way, I first cultivated a great deal of space so I could see clearly. Then, over time, I was able to heal and recognize where change was inevitable and needed in that situation.
The truth is: Change took me by surprise, and it led me into deeper shifts, more loss, then, in the end, growth, true belonging, and personal freedom.
I couldn’t see it in the midst, but my unmet expectations were for the greater good of my evolution as a human.
Change resulted in expansion.
3 – Neurodivergence
The last reason I want to highlight why change can feel so hard is neurodivergence. I bring this up because I identify as neurodivergent, as do many of my clients. That said, everyone experiences neurodivergence differently. Please take what serves you and leave the rest.
As a neurodivergent human, change can be challenging and require great internal and external support.
Due to high sensitivity and a need for clarity, when rapid change occurs, I can break down, my migraines ramp up, and my cognitive problem-solving skills decline.
Learning how to navigate change and tending to my nervous system has allowed for the growth needed to create EVEN more support for myself (monetarily, relationally, and internally).
As I have crafted supportive coping strategies for change, I have made more money with ease, developed deeper friendships that honor and celebrate uniqueness and difference, and navigated my emotions with greater capacity and flexibility.
Change, even as a neurodivergent human, has resulted in more freedom.
Ultimately, each of these “Why’s” share the same thing: Change is hard at times, and also, with time and self-tending, change can result in a better, more fulfilling life.
The freedom on the other side: Change is expansive. Change is exciting. Change = possibility. Change = freedom.
Time and time again, I see it: Leaning into change is the best decision my clients and I have ever made.
Here is what they have had to say about saying YES to change and choosing personal freedom:
“Megan has helped me to see that I’m more capable of achieving my own definition of success than I realized. Prior to working together I had just gotten married, moved to a new state, started working on a new career, and so much more. She helped me find ways to break through my roadblocks and lean into my emotions on a daily basis. She was gentle, kind and truly listened to me without judgement so that I could stay in action, always making decisions that will lead to my own happiness. Megan truly helped me to feel brave.”
“When I began working with Megan I knew I wanted to get crystal clear about what I wanted out of life. I had experienced a series of big life changes that left me unbalanced and unsure about what I wanted to accomplish next. My time coaching with Megan was restorative, challenging, supportive, reflective and empowering. She challenged me to dig in, reflect and answer big questions that helped to define my voice and set healthy boundaries. Through this series, I discovered how to trust myself and set goals that are helping me purposefully move forward in work and life. She communicated clearly with me and was deeply connected and available for whatever thoughts and questions I had. It was truly amazing!”
How can YOU lean into change? How can you navigate change and keep calm during transition, so that you can live as your most free and alive self?
5 Tips To Keep Calm During Transition
Sometimes when seeking to create a more aligned life, things have to shift, change, and get uprooted first. I know that has been the case for me, time and time again, as I grow, cultivate new friendships, make job choices, and more…and the uprooting process is not always easy.
Specifically, when moving or in a significant transition, life can feel uncertain and uncomfortable, and for even the most grounded human, it can stir up anxiety.
Here are 5 SUPER PRACTICAL tips to help you keep calm during transition so that you can truly live free!
1 – Plan Ahead
Whether you are neurodivergent and love to know ALL the details, or you tend to be disorganized and throw it all together last minute, I first recommend crafting your plan.
Make a note of what the change is: moving, a new job, a health difficulty, getting a pet, whatever it may be. Note where you are going, who you are connecting with, how you will maintain your routines, where you can get water and food, and what supplies you’ll need along the way.
You can get as detailed or flexible as you desire, but I highly recommend WRITING your plan down so that you can easily access it if things seem to be going sideways. This plan is not so you can rigidly cling to it. It’s more of a guidebook so you can respond to whatever comes in the most supportive way possible.
2 – Determine Your “Safety Blankets.”
I don’t care if you are three or thirty-three years old. We all need a boost of comfort here and there! Craft a list (or a fun box or corner in your home!) of your “Safety Blankets.” These items could be literal blankets, specific teas or coffees you like, a smooth stone from your favorite “woo woo” shop, a favorite water bottle, a journal, or a candle. Whatever brings you a sense of calm and comfort. Keep these close during transition and change. Ensure that you can access them easily throughout this season or journey.
3 – Eat!
During big seasons of transition, I have the most challenging time making space for cooking healthy meals, but they are also necessary so that my body feels good and I don’t get migraines. Without careful consideration, I can oscillate between not eating and reaching for all the junk food I can handle. Not great support during a season of transition.
Instead, I have learned that having easy, healthy meals and snacks is crucial. Sometimes this looks like ordering a month’s worth of Daily Harvest (Use my code, and you’ll get up to $40 off your first order) and making bone broth to use in the meals. Keeping my pantry stocked with healthy snack bars, nuts, and teas. Or picking up five Trader Joe’s frozen boxed Pho that I can pop in a pan and call it a day. Whatever it is that YOU need so you can support your body amidst change.
4 – Communicate your needs, and listen to the needs of your people
So often, embracing the Dominant Dogma, “change is hard,” is rooted in not having your needs met during change as a child. This tip is directly tending to that by using your voice to speak your needs and honoring those around you by listening to their needs. Others may not always be able to join you in meeting your needs, but you can always ask for support and invite them into this with you. In turn, you can always let others know you don’t have the capacity to meet their needs, but when possible, you can meet them the same way they are meeting you. Use your voice. Show your inner little one that it’s possible.
5 – Make a Plan For Creating Stability in This New Season
Just as you planned for the season of change, make a plan for as things settle. Once you have the new job, make the move, get the diagnosis, what does creating stability mean to YOU? What do you want life to look, feel, and taste like? How can you cultivate that? How can you cultivate freedom in this new season, knowing that true freedom is always found in the present?
These five tips are not only practical tools for navigating transition, but as I mentioned previously, by engaging in these practices, you are also reparenting that little one within. The little you who didn’t have the support they needed during seasons of change, you are giving that to YOURSELF now. So lean into that, remember that, and trust that you can make it through to the freedom on the other side of change.
Before we close this episode, I want to offer one more tool for support amidst transition: My FREE EcoTherapy Meditation!
On my website, I have a FREE brand new EcoTherapy Meditation and journal guide that you can use as you call in change, navigate transition, and claim your freedom. You can learn more about EcoTherapy and access the meditation at my website: megscolleen.com
And that is what I want to leave you with today! Change is expansive. Change is exciting. Change = possibility. Change = freedom.
If you listened to today’s episode, I would love to know! Please tag me on Instagram @megscolleen or shoot me a dm and fill me in on how this episode landed with you! Additionally, if you want support on your Freedom Journey, I would love to invite you into a one-on-one coaching series.
If deep in your spirit you want to feel empowered, share your creativity, live with freedom, and finally feel joyful again, then you’re in the right place! My goal is to help you integrate the parts of you feeling afraid and unsupported, hand back the outdated cultural stories, and guide you to rise as the deeply, wildly, and holistically free human you already are.
This is your time to embody the freedom you crave.
Your next step: Book a FREE Clarity Call with me at megscolleen.com! I hope to see you on a call soon!
Freedom is yours,
Mentions & More:
- My FREE (& brand new) EcoTherapy Meditation and journal guide that you can use as you release unsupportive conditioning, calm your nervous system, and reclaim personal power.
- My 1:1 coaching series. Book a FREE clarity call with me to get started: https://megscolleen.com/book-a-free-call/
- Use my code for Daily Harvest and you’ll get up to $40 off your first order
- My Instagram. If you use the 5 tips to stay calm during transition or feel compelled by what was shared in this episode, please feel free to connect with me there.