Hello, my loves!
I am really stoked for this week’s episode of Live Your Freedom Now, because the Dominant Dogma we’re confronting today is something that speaks to the perfectionist inside of me — and it’s something I need to hear. I hope you feel the same.
We’ll be exploring the “get it together” mentality that makes us feel like we have to, well, get our sh*t together to be worthy of love, respect, and success. Certainly, our hyper-perfectionist culture on social media doesn’t help us think critically about this Dominant Dogma, but it also goes all the way back to certain creation stories that relay the message that we are inherently bad (or sinful) and need to do, say, or be certain things to be considered enough.
I say no more!
In this episode, I’ll dive into:
- Our desires to have our lives and business together for people to want to purchase from us, or even be in relationships with us
- How our hyper-perfectionist culture is damaging our mental health
- The Dominant Dogma of “getting it together” and what that can look and sound like in our daily lives
- How long-lasting concepts like sin and redemption have become tools of our capitalist society
- The freedom in being a messy human
Listen to the episode wherever you like to listen to your podcasts
Read on for quote highlights or listen to the episode below:
Hello hello, beautiful humans,
Today I am so excited to be writing to you from my local library in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. This is so exciting because since I moved to this area in late 2019, I have only been able to work from here a few times due to it initially closing down when Covid hit, and then amidst the pandemic, they began incredible renovations which have just now been complete. And so, I sit here at a wooden table, a fresh decaf coffee beside me, my giant cozy sweater on, and I’m looking out at the waterfront park on this rainy spring day.
Just as I take a moment to reflect and take in this present moment, I encourage you to do the same. Noticing the textures around you, the colors, where there is light surrounding you, where there are shadows. Notice if there are any reflections like I am now seeing the trees sway on the glass which is covering the wooden table I am working from. Notice if there is any nature around you, including a pet, a plant, a stone or a crystal. As you notice your surroundings, I encourage you to simply notice them, not make meaning of them or label them good or bad. Simply notice the present moment and embrace the freedom within this exploration.
Today, our focus is discussing the Dominant Dogma, “You must have it together before you can help, work, or have a successful business!” Now that’s a mouthful, so I’ve shortened it to, “Get it together!”
Have you ever felt like you are “supposed to” have your life more put together in order for people to want to purchase from you, be in a relationship with you, or even spend time with you?
In our hyper-perfectionist modern world, this sensation is becoming more and more prominent, impacting folk’s mental health across the nation. The West’s rising obsession with self-help and perfection (in life and business) has largely been said to be due to our own creation story myth. Passed down from our ancestors is the belief that we are inherently bad, or sinful, resulting in the sensation we are not enough, that we need to get it together, and that we are not worthy of thriving until we do. Whether you identify as religious or not, many of us are born subconsciously living from this disposition, and it primes us as targets for marketing schemes within the capitalistic model. As James Boyce states in an article for the Guardian, “The need for redemption has shaped the language of the market, technological innovation, advertising, politics and, most obviously, self-help movements.” – source
In business, this internalized Dominant Dogma can sound like:
- My brand needs to look better before people buy
- I MUST have a rock-solid mental state before I am hire-able
- Even though I have 5 certifications and a degree I need to know more before people pay me
- My work/life balance must be perfect if I want people to respect my business
- The systems in my business should be fully established before I am worthy of getting paid
- I need to be a prime example of health and fitness before people will respect my perspective
- All of this, and THEN you will be worthy of success and paying customers.
These narratives (internal and external) are especially prominent in high control environments but tend to run rampant online as well, where we watch the curated posts of our friends, colleagues, and heroes alike sharing their most alive, shiny, and happy moments. These curated highlight reels function as a primer, where our online experiences are then intermixed with marketing ads reminding us of all we DON’T have and the solutions we “need” to buy so we too can have a regular posting schedule of shiny moments.
The truth is: We’re all messy, figuring it out humans, and it doesn’t matter where you are in your life or business: The work you have to offer is valid. The training and education you’ve received to offer your skillset, products, or courses are valid, even as you’re on this life journey yourself.
Due to the highlight reels and our innate desire to thrive, it can be so easy to get caught up believing that someone out there has been enlightened and received the “word” or “codes” we need in order to breakthrough into salvation, success, or thriving. And yes, there are incredibly supportive products, coaches, therapists, healers, artists, and more who can and do impact our journey (my own work is built on this truth!). However, the folks offering these tools and resources are also humans, navigating life imperfectly just like you.
I am a trained coach, healer, marketer, and artist…and I’m a human living and figuring out life just like everyone else.
As I sit here looking out the library window, the analogy showing itself, are the budding trees outside the window. Each year their branches bud, they grow new leaves, in summer they offer their shade, their beauty, then fall comes, they shed that season’s leaves, hibernate, and begin the whole cycle again.
They don’t suddenly pause throughout their development and say, “Oh shit, I don’t have things together today, my leaves are just not growing fast enough, I am not worthy of being sat under or enjoyed!” That would be absurd! And yet, that is how many of us feel. As if our life journey, wherever it may be, is not enough.
But the freedom on the other side of this Dominant Dogma is that you are enough. Right here and now.
Of course, there will always be things you desire to shift, change, and update, and that’s ok! And also, you are worthy of being paid for your skillset right here and now. You are worthy of thriving right here and now. You are worthy of running a business right here and now. You are worthy of living your freedom, living your self-authorized liberation, now.
And that is what I want to leave you with today. You are enough and you can live your freedom now!
As a reminder, this episode marks your last chance to join my Creative Business Accelerator! We begin our time together on June 1st, and as alum Jessicah Travis shares, this Accelerator will change your business for the better, not because there is a magic formula, but because you will find your magic, AND you’ll get all the practical support, systems, and structure you need to bring that creation to life! Apply now at megscolleen.com
All right, I’ll see you next week!
Freedom is yours,
“Passed down from our ancestors is the belief that we are inherently bad, or sinful, resulting in the sensation that we are not enough, that we need to get it together, and that we are not worthy of thriving until we do.”
“The truth is: We’re all messy, figuring it out humans, and it doesn’t matter where you are in your life or business: The work you have to offer is valid.”
“I am a trained coach, healer, marketer, and artist…and I’m a human living and figuring out life just like everyone else.”
“You are worthy of thriving right here and now. You are worthy of running a business right here and now. You are worthy of living your freedom, living your self-authorized liberation, now.”
Mentions & More:
- James Boyce’s wisdom on “How original sin led to a western obsession with self-help”
- My Creative Business Accelerator: On My Terms
- My FREE Integral Sales & Marketing Masterclass for you to download NOW